Wednesday, November 25, 2009

STFU

STFU- or, speak the fuck up. That's my new mantra for any interaction with a doctor. At my last IVF cycle, my eggs took a really long time to fertilize because apparently they were immature. I'm convinced that the early retrieval was one of the biggest factors contributing to the failure of that cycle. During my consult with the RE, I asked if I could stim for a few more days and trigger when my follicles are about 20mm, rather than triggering at 16-18mm. I felt confident that I could handle the extra growth, because my follicles were usually about 25 when I triggered on the unmedicated cycles. My doctor agreed and put a note in my file.

On Monday I went in for a scan and had a good number of follicles in the 15-17 range. The doctor said that I should trigger that night, and come in Wed for the retrieval. The old Gayby Rabies would have just trusted the doctor and done the shot that night. But not the new Gayby, who has vowed to live by STFU. I patiently reminded the doctor- the same one who put the note in my record in the first place- that we had agreed I'd stim a little longer before triggering. She played around on the computer for a minute, and then found the information about my last cycle. She agreed to let me stim a little longer, and I'm feeling more positive about this cycle.

So the good news is that upon triggering, I have a number of follicles that are 20mm and above. The bad news? My retrieval is scheduled for 11am on Thanksgiving Day. I'm still not sure how I am going to pull that off. I still haven't told my family we're TTC. Somehow, I have to get from the clinic to my aunt's house- which is 1 1/2 away without holiday traffic- in time for Thanksgiving dinner. They can't know why we're so late. I think I'm going to have to take a page from the book of my crazy co-worker and come up with a wild excuse. Please just let this be the last time I have to lie to my family.

11 comments:

Schroedinger said...

STFU sounds like a great plan. I am impressed that your RE's office is open on Thanksgiving! I'm so tempted to make a hokey joke about hoping the turkey's not going to be the only thing in the oven by the time you get to Thanksgiving dinner...or maybe turkey basters...
Can't you just blame excessive traffic, a broken down car blocking two lanes? Good luck!

Anonymous said...

I am ALL OVER STFU. Only we can be our best advocates. DOctors make mistakes, they are sloppy. It happens. Good for you for speaking up and responding to your gut!

As for how you'll get to your aunt's on time? Creativity, my friend. I am sure that you can fabricate one heck of a lie (lost wallet that you need to return and look for? I have used that one before. It was convincing)Maybe you should hold a 24 hour contest to see who can provide you with the most complelling lie? I am dying to hear what you tell them!

I am thrilled for you that this cycle was good. That you have lots to retrieve. I have it all crossed for you, my friend...

Happy T-day and happy retrieval!

AdventuresInBabyMaking said...

I agree - we are our best advocates.

As far as your excuse, I guess you can't say you dropped your keys in the snow, so I say go w/ "we got whiplash turning to look at an accident." That one is brilliant.

:)

Anonymous said...

Good for you for STFU, even if it's going to be a bit incveeenient this time around. How about saying that you found a puppy wandering the streets and had to track down its owners? You could always smile sweetly and say, "We thought about bringing him with us, but we didn't want to test if he was potty trained on your carpets..."

CJ said...

I learned VERY quickly with my daughter that I had to speak up because no one else would do it for her.

When her appendix burst, they wanted to send her home. I said, hell no. It's in her belly. Look in her belly. It's not a heart infections. It's not a bacterial infection. It's in her belly.

Had I taken her home, she wouldn't be here. Her appendix was shredded.

Anonymous said...

Good for you! I think you are totally right stimming longer and triggering around 20mm. Do you plan to do ICSI this time? We had 18 eggs retrieved and only six fertilized and the RE said if we did it again she would ICSI the hell out of them (not her exact words)...

I hope all goes well tomorrow. Good luck with the excuse. I am the worst liar ever in these situations. Dead car battery? It would probably take forever to get a tow truck out to jump it and you wouldn't want to bother friends or neighbors on a holiday.

P said...

Good for you for speaking up. I work in the medical field and see so many times when people need to be their own advocates but believe that the doctors always right so the dont speak up. We know our bodies the best and after doing this so many times we really get a hold on whats going on with ourselves.
That is really good news about your follies. I hope this is the one for you.
As for what you can tell your family...tell them you were helping out a soup kitchen it will score you some brownie points. Anyway what you really are doing is for a wonderful cause.

Lisa said...

Loving STFU. Sometimes doctors are kinda into the cookie cutter process so only we can be our best advocates. I wish I did more of that when I worked with the RE. It's hard sometimes because you feel like you should trust them because they are doctors but a fellow ttc'er once told me to trust my own body and I truly believe that now. Good luck tomorrow. Tell them you got a flat, that you forgot dp's medication and had to turn around, you slept late, you couldn't find anything to wear, there was traffic (probably true), they'll understand later on.

Anonymous said...

We are all about STFU so good on you! And hopefully it pays off big time, I really think it's great that you're holding off a little longer this time so I'm glad you're doc is behind it too. Good luck tomorrow, I'll be thinking of you. Oh and I like the dead battery idea best!

Libberal said...

Looove STFU. Love that you came up with a snappy acronym we all can and should realize in our own doc encounters. Thanks. Hope whatever you came up with worked!

Anonymous said...

Crap Gayby, I have been MIA and I am sad to see that I missed this post. I hope everything yurned out perfectly (I haven't read your follow up post yet) and I hope you had plenty to be thankful for on that day. I'm thinking of you and sending all the best for a berpect cycle, a perfect pregnancy and a perfect baby of your own. xo