Wednesday, February 8, 2012

The toddler lunch table

I like food. I like cooking food, eating food, watching TV shows about food, even looking at pictures of food online. Before my kids were born, I decided that I would do whatever I had to do to ensure that they'd be good eaters. I think we're doing a halfway decent job so far. We always eat dinner as a family, even though that means that the meal is a bit more frenzied, and served a bit earlier than the adults would like. The kiddos are fairly adventurous, and will at least taste anything we put in front of them.
I searched high and low looking for the right food containers to send to daycare. I wanted something that was leakproof. I wanted something microwave safe. I wanted compartments, but I wanted the option that some of the compartments could be kept cold and others could be heated. We've been using this, and so far been really happy with it. I do my best to make sure to pack a variety of different things. The daycare teachers report that the kids love to eat.

But then they moved to the toddler room. And the daycare provides food for kids in the toddler room and up. Some parents still pack lunches, but I think most happily let their kids eat what is provided. From what I can see, the meals are a rotation of hot dogs, pizza, grilled cheese, chicken nuggets, ziti, and mac and cheese (no joke, just 6 items). The sides are canned fruit, and canned veggies topped with a healthy dose of country crock. Not exactly the quality or variety I want my kids eating every day. So I've continued to pack lunches. But their end of the day reports show that the kids have been getting daycare food too. Nobody even asked me if it was okay to give to them.

For a few days, I struggled over how to address this. It appears that most of the kids there eat the daycare food. I didn't want to be know as the bitch who thinks her kids are too good for the food that is perfectly fine for all the other kids. The head teacher, who I needed to talk to about the issue was out for a few days, so that bought my chickenshit ass as little more time. Besides, how much damage could a little grilled cheese do. But then it happened. Somebody gave my kids chicken nuggets. Chicken nuggets scare me. It pushed me to stop being a wimp, and I talked to someone immediately. Though of course, I couldn't bring myself to say that I thought the food they served was poor quality and I didn't want my kids to have it. I just asked if there was a problem with the food I was sending, or if I wasn't sending enough. It turns out that, being typical toddlers, my kids just want what all the other kids have if their own lunch isn't one of their favorites. Apparently, they cry, whine, point and beg when they see that other kids are eating something different.

I'm at a bit of a loss on what to do. I don't want my kids to be hungry, and I know that there is not enough staff at the daycare to sit with them for however long it takes to decide they're willing to eat what I've packed. And it's impossible to force feed a toddler. They can't be separated from the other kids at mealtimes. Because I was in a hurry to get to work, the only thing I could think to say at the time was that I didn't want them getting any meat. I figure that's the worst of the stuff they'd be getting there. At the moment, I think my best option for dealing with the other stuff is to pack the tried and true stuff they love for their lunches, in the hopes that it distracts them from the other stuff. I've been wrestling with the way I've handled the situation all day, wondering if I made the right choice. I can't decide if it's better for them to eat something that's not what I would chose to serve, or be hungry. Am I being a food snob by saying I don't want them eating daycare food, or am I being irresponsible for not stopping it immediately? In the meantime, if anyone has any toddler friendly recipes they'd like to share, I'm all ears!

11 comments:

Shannon said...

That's a tough situation. Hard to believe they're serving such poor choices regularly. None of them are horrible but none are great and if that's all they're offering, it's a poor menu. I don't think any of those things are bad choices in moderation, but every day? It sounds like they're trying to have a kid-friendly menu with all kid favourites, but it's not really helping them develop healthy eating choices.

I'm in Canada and our daycare centre follows the Canada Food Guide so our kiddos get good, healthy lunches the majority of the time, with stuff like grilled cheese as a treat once in a while. They've never had a hot dog or pizza there. They do have chicken strips but they make them on-site. My kids are served things like pork tenderloin, caesar salad and beef stroganoff. And guess what? They eat it! They even had a turkey dinner with all the trimmings for Thanksgiving. Sometimes I wish I was going there for lunch...

I'm not sure what I'd do in your situation. I think instead of trying to find some way to get the kids to eat what you're sending, I'd be pushing for the daycare to offer more variety. I'd talk to them about how this isn't a very healthy menu for toddlers and it isn't what you want your kids eating every day. See if you can get some other parents who have the same opinion to back you up. Do some research into recipes that may cost about the same as what they're serving now and offer them to the daycare. Surely there are things they can make other than hot dogs, grilled cheese, nuggets and pizza!

Strawberry said...

Not wanting our kid to eat the daycare's food was one of the BIGGEST reasons we pulled him out of daycare #2. Of course, the food at daycare #2 was worse than what you wrote, but I still don't like the list you wrote at all. I fully agree with you. And I think if it matters that much to you, like it does to me, sadly, I'd find another place for them. We are big food snobs, but luckily we have Curly at a USDA certified daycare that serves all lunches and snacks, for which we get a monthly menu, and we can see that it is a variety of good, healthy food...and Curly always eats some or all of what he is served. They occasionally throw in something unhealthy for a craft project, but I really think our daycare is as good as it gets regarding food. Good luck whatever you decide to do. I totally understand your frustration.

Shannon said...

Also, I was wondering if getting the kids involved in making their own lunches will make them more excited about eating them? Give them choices and get them to help pack it, then make a big deal about how they packed their own lunches.

JDZ said...

I think you handled the situation well and choosing to opt out of the meat was a smart "on the spot idea".
It's disgusting that daycares are feeding kids this crap. Why do so many people put up with it? I posted a question about daycare menus on a message board once and the replies included POP tarts for breakfast!!!
Unless you're going to call in Jamie Oliver or switch daycares your kids are going to see that crap and want it. I'd go with no meat and 1/2 to 1/4 portions of the Mac n cheese, pizza and grilled cheese as a "supplement" to their good food. No comment on the ziti. WTH is that? I had to google and I'm not sure if I'd be ok with that.

MrsSpock said...

My son does not eat the day care food either, though he usually points at it and goes, Ewwwwww. He likes his PB & J best of all. Even if he didn't have a dairy allergy, I wouldn't let him have it. I make my own chicken nuggets.

reproducinggenius said...

I'm a food snob, and I don't apologize for it, and I think that list is pretty awful. It could be worse, but it's pretty bad. Can you get a schedule from them so that you know what they're serving when? That way, your kids might have something that looks similar but is higher quality. This is what I would be inclined to do--or I might share the new MyPlate guidelines with them (ChooseMyPlate.gov) to help them at least think about the choices they're making for the kids. Ugh. I don't envy your situation, but starting children on this diet just seems like a recipe for diabetes and poorly trained palates!

Pufferfish said...

This is a really hard situation. And I remember from your past blogs that you are very limited with daycare possibilities.
I think Repro's suggestion of looking at other menu options is a good one.
Only bad habits can come from such a limited menu of poor food choices. That is really too bad.
Don't give in. The fact you have adventurous, healthy eaters is HUGE. Keep up the good work, mama.

Isa said...

Hmm..would it work to have them tell the kids that they have to eat half of their lunch before they can have what the other kids get? Or to just give them a little 'treat' of whatever's being served after their meal (a weird form of dessert)? I have no experience so no real idea, but it sucks that you have to figure this out.

Bionic Baby Mama said...

Ugh. I'm sorry you're in this position. All the options seems sucky, but I think I vote for the 1/4-1/2 portion idea above, on the grounds that while nutrition is an important part of what food is for, it's not the only thing that food is for. To whit: food is also for bonding with one another, and treading carefully around that subject seems worth a few transfats to me.

...but ask me again when I'm actually in this situation, because this high horse is REALLY slippery....

Poppycat said...

I know I am waaaay late commenting but all I have to say is WTF? Hotdogs, canned fruit and chicken nuggets? That's unbelievable to me. Healthy eating for children is a passion of mine, in fact I've been debating a rant about it on my blog. I'd lose my shit frankly and I totally understand why you did too. How are you supposed to combat that? How can you make sure they are eating well when they are serving that to the other kids? I imagine you feel trapped between the proverbial rock and a hard place. I hope you have found a workable compromise and I'm sending good juju your way.

Preschool in Sheepshead bay said...

Hmmm that must be a tough one indeed knowing that kids really love eating and we cant stop them. But how about if parents would help in preparing foods/lunch for their kids?